Gaslighting

It wasn't until recently that I learned what this word truly meant and now I can't stop using it in my every day vocabulary. It's so relevant and I feel like so many people need to hear this word. Basically gaslighting is when someone manipulates you so much to the point where you are questioning your own sanity and if you're going crazy. This has happened to me time and time again, mostly in relationships. Guys jump to the conclusion like "oh you're just crazy" but really I'm just reacting. I am reacting to their actions or words in an emotional way and they can't handle it because they think they're right, or they aren't an emotional person, or whatever the reason. And to be honest, I'm not a very emotional person when it comes to romantic relationships, but when I feel something I don't hide those feelings. I speak my truth always. And I have found that that scares people or intimidates them.

In the last few years I have really connected to my womanhood and have embraced other women in my life as well. I stopped trying to compete with people and started just uplifting them and in doing so I have uplifted myself. And as women, we experience this feeling so often. This word, gaslighting, has opened my eyes to realize that people really do try to manipulate you for their own benefit and to put you in a place of self-loathing. That is not the place you want to be nor is it a place you should be. Sometimes, yes we can overreact as humans and it is a major flaw in some people. However, the key word in overreact is "react." Because you truly are just reacting to how the other person is treating you. There wouldn't be an overreaction if there wasn't something to react to. So moral of the story is to never worry about how you express your emotions. And when you feel like you're being gaslighted, speak on that. You are not crazy and your emotions are so valid.

People who try to gaslight others are somewhat insecure about their own emotions and how to process them so they feel like when someone knows exactly what they are feeling and they express it, that that makes them crazy. I try to put myself in other peoples' shoes in order to understand what they are feeling and what they are seeing. And when someone gaslights me and I do try to understand why they say that I'm crazy, I always come to the same conclusion: I am so comfortable with who I am, what I deserve, and what I want that that's intimidating and scary to others. People don't handle that well so they resort to insults or in this case, gaslighting. It's a way of them trying to make sense of everything. So I think those people will eventually work out their inner demons and be able to process their emotions but in the mean time if you are a person who knows your worth, don't be afraid to react in fear you might be gaslighted. Because all in all, your emotions are correct. It is literally impossible for your emotions to be wrong. The brain does what it wants and processes things the way it wants there is zero control over that. So let yourself feel your emotions and express them in any way you feel is healthy, safe, and good for you.

~Feed the Soul