Pain, and all its baggage

People experience pain in so many different ways. One thing that really strikes me is that when someone emotionally hurts you, you still feel physical pain. Even though nobody has touched you or brought you physical harm, you're still there feeling broken. Whether its a sharp pain in your chest, or a pit in your stomach. Pain is a hard concept to grasp sometimes. In a physical sense, it's easy. You get punched in the stomach and yeah, it hurts; that's it.

One thing I do know about pain, no matter what kind of pain it is, it demands to be felt. I learned that from the book, Fault In Our Stars. It's corny I know, but extremely true. You don't decide whether or not something hurts you, it just does. There isn't a way to prevent being hurt either. Some people try to say that they close themselves off or are "cold-hearted" but again, you cannot control what hurts.

Another thing I find compelling about pain is that you are alone in it. Sure people relate or go through similar, if not the same situations as you, but ultimately you are in your own head and have to deal with it by yourself. Pain carries so much baggage with it which then creates baggage for you. For example, the first time I truly had my heart broken by a guy I felt really alone and like the world was crashing down. I was young so I obviously didn't know that that wasn't the case and I was being a bit dramatic. Anyway, it affected me nonetheless. And so as I entered another relationship eventually I found that I now carried some baggage with me. I was difficult to deal with and stubborn and sometimes stand-offish toward my partner. And so this lead to another heart break and so on and so forth throughout all the relationships I developed in my life. Each time, a worse heartbreak and each time more and heavier baggage. But one thing remained the same. I was always left alone to feel the pain. I think some people don't realize that when they hurt you. They don't think about you or how you're feeling. Although, sometimes it is impossible to completely avoid hurting someone.

One thing is for sure though, you always have people around you who support you and love you. So yeah feel your pain and deal with it in the best ways you know how, but never let it consume you no matter how alone you may feel. And forgive me if this post seemed a little pointless to you, but I felt compelled to write it. Pain is real and it can really do some serious damage. So I hope no matter what kind of pain you are in, you turn to your loved ones for help and support because I have been there. We all have been there. We all have been left behind, and left alone to feel that pain.

~Feed the Soul